God is Near. I AM enough. God is good.

Biggest role I will play to date? Mom of a child with a distorted view of eating/image/self. If you have followed my blog for the past few years, then, you know my story. I have an ED.

I’ve always been brave. Not always protected or championed.

I ask to “walk on water”, but I think that I have been walking on water. His arms stretched out. He knows that I am brave. His arms stay out. He is SO strong and SO patient. I get out there . . . in the waves. . . in the wind. . . in the path of the squall line. . . He gives me a choice (and He loves me no matter): stay in the boat, get out of the boat, walk, retreat back to the boat. . . He waits. He could make me, walk. But, He made me brave. He knows that I can, and He reminds me that I have nothing to be afraid of (even the bravest need to be reminded).

Maybe? It’s not so much about protecting __________________ from it. Instead, helping them to be safe. Helping them to establish boundaries. Helping them to know right/wrong. So, when, NOT IF, they are disappointed, when, NOT IF, they feel out of control, they will know they have a choice, too,  and I will love ______________ no matter what!

People in our lives are NEVER there by chance. It’s our journey <just that>. . . ours: our sorrow, our grief, our joy, our race. . . But, OH! the people he brings to walk with us. The creator of all things. The God of purpose. The God of intention, He KNOWS. He knows the ones we need. He knows the ones who will be with us in the deep, dark. He’s sent the ones to sit in the still and stagnant. He’s appointed the ones to take our joy to another level.

And His tears–Oh, don’t miss His tears. They came from a heart as broken as yours or mine.

-Max Lucado, THE MANGER

As women a disordered view of food/image/self can become a fight for life, a fight for freedom. Never would I have imagined my beautiful child. . . my precious, beloved child. . . taking up this fight too.

“God is near. I AM enough. God is good” has been my prayer, my truth, my desperate plea. And, it is true. It has been true in the middle of the night when I wake up in fear. It has been true in the counselor’s office when the tears will not stop. It has been true on my long runs, when I am not sure I can do this. . . 

1 thought on “God is Near. I AM enough. God is good.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s